Puasa

It's the 6th day of Ramadhan, the fasting month. So far, so good, at least physically. Got lots of works to do, yet my brain seems to think that this is holiday. Rather slow to respond, and needs to be reminded to get the job done. Maybe the result of interrupted sleep.

This year is the first year my eldest join the puasa. She seems to have no problem fending off hunger. Well, she used to have trouble eating right in the first place. What amazes me is she can actually wake up at 3.30 AM, have her meal, sleep again to be waken up at 6.00 to get ready for school. She breaks the fast once she got home from school, at around 12.30 PM. All seems so easy for her.

My approach to puasa is very much depends on my 'mood'. Several times I had forsaken it all together because I didn't feel like to. To my logic, why doing something so sacred as this if my heart is not into it? Better as well not doing it at all.

In my highschool day, when everyone there taken me for a christian, I fasted. No one knew. I was just as active as usual, training for the 'paskibra', doing everything just as I ordinarily would. My friends told me: easy for you to maintain your activities. You are not fasting. If only they knew.

This year, I fast. For what particular reason I am not sure. I haven't committed myself to the religion yet. Maybe it's more about pushing myself to control myself. Not just physically, but also mentally. As long as there's good that can be expected, why not?

Peace be upon you.